Darren Hayes has told AAP about his struggle with his sexual identity and coming out. Once one half of on of Australia's most successful duo's, Savage Garden, Darren was in Sydney ahead of his mentoring session on Australia Idol this week.

Since splitting from Savage Garden, Hayes, who now lives in the UK, has released three solo albums to reasonable success and toured, and has also come out as gay and married his partner Richard Cullen.

He has just finished working on a DVD of his last album 'This Delicate Thing We've Made', and says he's very "zen" at the moment, with much of his happiness credited to Cullen, who he's been married to for two years.

As for his stance on gay marriage, it's something he wishes was possible in Australia.

"I would love to see my marriage recognised here, more than anything as a sign of reciprocal respect for Richard," Hayes said.

"I think it's something that would happen with this current government, certainly it wasn't a possibility with the last one.

"It's interesting because for me we got married regardless of the piece of paper, but we wanted to express and have acknowledgment with our family. It was a very powerful thing."

Hayes also traversed the topic of his early sexual identity struggle, which he endured most of his life. He was married to wife Colby Taylor, but separated after four years of marriage during Savage Garden's peak time in 1998.

"I was really struggling with it (being gay)," Hayes said.

"Most people who knew me knew it was a very difficult process, growing up the way that I did, in the culture that I did and the country that we have where it wasn't the norm.

"I grew up not through anyone's fault, just the reality, of not really thinking that who I was was permanent.

"Or who I was was acceptable."

Life got easier for him as he travelled more and met many types of people, he said.

"The person I feel that I am is a human being first and foremost and it just so happens that I think boys are very cute.

"And it took me a long time to reconcile with that - that 'that' was ok," he said.

"I think I was respected because I may be the first gay performer who didn't lie about who they were - I just spent years waiting to be outed and that never happened."

And Hayes also intends on passing on a lesson of self-respect and honesty, as well as a few others when he comes to teach the young Idol hopefuls.

"When you've poured your heart out to the nation and you have this dream and you think I don't have to work in the video store anymore ... that's a pretty big risk you take for your ego because you may have to go back to your day job - you may have to face up to the man on the street.

"I still do. They say 'Whatever happened to Savage Garden? Do you still put records out?'."

"It's a very humbling experience to be able to say 'Yeah I do actually, they're not as successful anymore but yes, I do'.

"I think that's an important part of the business to know."

Tags: Australian Idol, Darren Hayes, gay, gay marriage